I stumbled across some old emails this morning from when I was pregnant. Sometimes it seems so weird to think that. I was pregnant. I am a mother. But my baby isn't here. This is just so evil and wrong. It just cant be real. Yes I still have a hard time believing this happened. It has already been 4 months but it has only been 4 months.
Thanksgiving was so hard. All I could think about was last year. We took the weekend and went to Hot Springs to try and relax. Last year it was much easier. I just laid on the porch in the sun dreaming of my baby and my new life as a mother. This year was cold. What is there left to dream of when you lose your child?
I am so grateful for my wonderful husband, sister and family. I have found comfort in knowing we can have another baby. But no one can replace my beautiful little boy. So sad.
